Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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