i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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