My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
