is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
