he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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