how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
