about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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