She said her name was "party"
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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