RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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