i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
