When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize