i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
