so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I need water and some morals
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
