Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
