she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
She even gives head with a lisp.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
