just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize