I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize