I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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