that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
they need to just BURY HIM!
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize