like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Drake has all the answers
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
