cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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