so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
