She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Two words: blizzard sex
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize