So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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