i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
