I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize