U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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