It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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