Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
