Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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