Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Randomize
