do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'll put lettuce on them
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary