Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
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I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
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He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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