Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
