this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
