I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
