Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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