these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
