isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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