I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
