why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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