I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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