i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
