So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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