So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
