after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
