I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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