Jerry, you need to find god
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm bleeding and have questions
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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