We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
