I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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