Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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