Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
