i love accidental penises.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize